Supporting Your Anxious Kid at School with Gretchen Keller, LCSW

Managing anxiety about school takes a team approach.

Gretchen Keller, MSW, LCSW

Just in time for parent teacher conferences, we’re thrilled to interview Gretchen Keller, MSW, LCSW, Elementary Care Coordinator for Parkway School District, about how parents and schools can work together to best support their anxious student. Whether your child is refusing to go to school, having panic attacks at school, feeling overwhelmed, or struggling with perfectionism, it’s important to reach out key supporters at school.

Why did you choose to become a care coordinator in St. Louis?

I chose to work in schools as a mental health clinician because I saw the impact that collaborating with school personnel can have on my clients. I am able to work with students in the moment when they are anxious or upset and help them to use their skills we learn about in our sessions. I am able to connect with parents and teachers to create plans to support students' mental health both at school and at home.

Briefly, what do you feel like is the most important part of your role as a care coordinator?

The most important part of my role as a care coordinator is to provide psychoeducation and mental health advocacy to both the student and their team of supporters at school. Once I provide them with knowledge, we can work on targeted interventions to reach their individual goals. I love being able to support parents and teachers with education and interventions so that they can reinforce what the student learns in our session out in the real world.

What grades do you work with?

I work with Kindergarten through 5th grade! I love early intervention when it comes to mental health concerns!

What signs can parents be on the lookout for that their child is having anxiety related to school?

I tell parents to look out for your child not wanting to attend school because of somatic issues like stomach aches, headaches, or nausea. It can be a red flag if your child starts to struggle with sleeping at night or becomes more irritable or reactive. More signs can include the child being fidgety or using the restroom more often around school time. It is also concerning when children become perfectionists and struggle to start or finish work.

When do you recommend that parents reach out to the school counselor?

I think early intervention is key! Your school counselor has lots of resources and ideas to support your child if they struggle with small or big worries!

The pressures on teens to do well can sometimes be hard for them to manage. When would you recommend private counseling for teens who are struggling with perfectionism, feeling overwhelmed, feeling under pressure to do well in sports, or navigating their social life?

Schools aren't able to do family therapy or joint sessions like a private therapist could. I always recommend private counseling for any age of student if the parent wants to be more involved in the sessions. I also encourage parents to think about private counseling if the student has met with the school counselor for a month or so and still is having anxious thoughts. Some students benefit from private counseling from the get go if their anxiety is very high and they would be uncomfortable being pulled by the school counselor from class. If parents are unsure about private counseling, I recommend they talk with the school counselor about their concerns or call to consult with a private therapist to learn more about the process.

Parent teacher conferences are coming up! We’d love your advice on how parents and schools can work together to best support their anxious students:

This is such a wonderful time to make a plan as a team! Let your child's teacher know if you want the school counselor to be present at the conference. I always think that the team approach is the most helpful. It can be difficult to share about your child's struggles but the more open you can be with the school, the more targeted they can make their interventions and plan to support your child. When parents share concerns with me, I am able to teach the student and their whole team coping skills and create a system for the student to feel supported in using them at school.

Share one fun fact about you that most people don’t know.

My top three favorite smells in the whole world are Johnson and Johnson pink baby lotion, Vicks Vaporub, and Coppertone sunscreen.

Anxiety therapy in St. Louis for worried kids, teens, and college students at Compassionate Counseling St. Louis:

We specialize in anxiety counseling and anger management therapy for kids, adolescents, and young adults age four on up. Our counseling team tailors their approach to you, your child, and your family’s needs.

It can be tough getting help, and if you’re wondering whether or not your child needs counseling for their anxiety, it can be helpful to talk with an expert. We always offer free phone screenings to talk about what’s going on for you, our clinical approach, and figuring out if counseling is the best next step for you.

Compassionate Counseling St. Louis provides specialized anxiety and anger management therapy for kids, teens, and college students. We work in Clayton, MO and serve kids, teens, and college students throughout St. Louis City, St. Louis County, Ladue, University City, Town and Country, Webster Groves, Creve Coeur, Kirkwood, Richmond Heights, and Brentwood. You can set up your free phone screening to see if we’re a good fit for your needs right on our website.