12 Tips for Winter Break: Week 1 - Strategize to Conquer This Stressful Time
Winter Break Tip #1 - Think Through Last Year
Our top tip for parents is to PLAN AHEAD. What went well last year? What were the challenges? What do you want to try out differently this time?
You can’t prepare for everything, but you can set a great plan for winter break. Prep your schedule for these upcoming weeks - what’s going to happen and when? Go through this schedule with your kids. Figure out what time will be structured and what time will be unstructured. And, prepare your expectations and time management.
Winter Break Tip #2 - Prepare
When you have expectations for your child’s behavior, it’s important to set your kid up for success. Some parents tell me they want to “test” their kids - which I get. But at the same time, why not coach your kid rather than test them. There will be plenty of opportunities to see how they handle things - use winter break as a time to focus on the positives, and really praise their positive choices.
We really encourage you to talk with your kids ahead of time about winter break. Ask them:
What did you like about winter break last year? What didn’t you like?
What felt difficult for you last year?
What do you 100% feel like we have to do over winter break to make it really enjoyable for you?
Last year, I noticed (specific behavior you’re concerned about). If this happens, what’s a good way for me to remind you to get back on track? How can I support you?
Winter Break Tip #3 - Be Intentional
When parents aren’t on the same page, kids pretty quickly figure out how to use the situation to their benefit.
Make sure you and your co-parent talk through expectations for winter break, and then have that conversation with your kids. Talk through what you expect them to do, and what you expect them to stay away from. Get their take on what felt fair last winter break, and what didn’t. Explore what family rules will shift over winter break (like for screen time, snacks, bed times, etc) and when those rules will go back to normal. Walk through that decision making process with your kids and teens.
And, plan through how you want to respond to things when you’re kid 1. isn’t following directions or 2. isn’t able to comply. You need your strategy IN PLACE before winter break. The best way to be intentional about consequences is to have a conversation with your kids ahead of time about what feels fair.
Go through examples of logical consequences (you don't have a crystal ball, but you do know that types of challenges your kids normally face) and help your child come up with a plan for how to avoid the things that normally get them in trouble. And, make sure to talk with your partner about how you'll handle meltdowns, fights, arguments, or anxiety outbursts in the different settings you'll be in.
Is Winter Break a challenge for you? Do you feel totally overwhelmed every year? It can be tough to keep things running smoothly when there’s so much time to fill - and especially tough for anxious, stressed out kids and teens (and their stressed out parents). We’re sharing with you our 12 Tips for Winter Break - but we’re available all year round for anxious child counseling, therapy for teens, and stress management for college students. Set up your free phone consult on our website at compassionatecounselingstl.com/consult
We work with kids, teens, and college students through the St. Louis region, including Clayton, Ladue, Webster Groves, Kirkwood, and Creve Coeur.
Thumbnail image provided by: Larry Clayton